Repetition is wonderful because it allows our body to be programmed on auto-pilot – like brushing your teeth every morning, or checking your phone the minute you wake up, therefore freeing up our mind to focus on other avenues of life. It can also however go into a negative spiral which is why it is so difficult to help break people out of patriarchal views when they have been surrounded by the same their whole life!

So, when you pick affirmations to change your paradigm system, pick them with the knowledge that they will allow your brain new ways to think about how you function in tandem with the world. The best affirmations are those that are super crisp, simply because it will be easy for your mind to process them and follow them on a regular basis.

The simplest affirmation that I can think of is loving yourself. The world has convinced us for so long that we need a partner to get through it, it’s almost as though we’re carrying an excessive bundle of love to give unconditionally to someone else instead of giving it with the most important person in our lives: ourselves!

Keep external circumstances out of your affirmations: remember that it is your mindset that you are changing for your benefit. Why would you waste all that valuable time trying to control the world, when it is only your mind that you control completely? How’s this for instance: I always get what I need. We’re swept up in living an aspirational lifestyle, wanting more and more. We forget to be grateful for the things we do have that will spur us on: a roof over our heads, a well-cooked meal, a loving relation. Gratitude in itself is the biggest affirmation that you can live your life by.

Don’t pick affirmations that you are using to console yourself. For instance, ‘I love myself’ is far more valuable than ‘I am lovable’ – the latter showcases a need to be loved by others, and if you really don’t believe it, this affirmation will backfire. The former on the other hand is simple, powerful and focuses around you.

Try to pick positive words that your brain will register – for example: ‘I am strong’ vs ‘I am not weak’

There is a negative in the latter which can subconsciously register with your brain irrespective of the intent behind your affirmation, i.e. it is possible your brain will only register the word ‘weak’ thereby making you miss out on your desired result. It may also be a good idea to place your name in the affirmation to help your mind associate the word you have picked with such a crucial piece of your identity. 

Use your core values to form your affirmation. Anything that you value is already a battle half-won because you’re more likely to believe in it than working your way around a feeling that is strange and new. For example:
I love my family and they love me.
My friends are always there for me.

I appreciate my job.

Finally, follow good news. Surrounding yourself with positive happenings makes your outlook more open, energetic and open to soaking up information. Direct your social media searches to good news, and follow pages or role models that emit a positive energy.